Friday December 11th – Monday December 21st 2009 – travellers tales

A very hectic period of travel and business which is why i have not been keeping up to date with my blog.

On my last day in Lima, i visited Goddess Joyce and Her baby.  It was also Senora Sylvia’s birthday and so i was fortunate enough to catch up with Her too and give Her a small gift – a silver photo frame in which She can put a photo of Her new grandson.  For Vincent, the grandson, i bought a silver spoon.  Goddess was very pleased with me.  She looked gorgeous as ever and i so wished i could have stayed longer but, i had a flight to catch and had to leave within an hour of arriving.  Earlier, i had had a number of business meetings in and around the city so my arrival was late as it was.

That night, i flew from Peru to London, via Madrid, arriving in London early Saturday evening.  i spent that night and the Sunday night with vanilla friends who live close to Heathrow in a small cottage.  No chance to dress “en femme” apart from the usual underwear and i chose matching pink lace bra and panties.  On the Monday, i travelled into London itself to stay in a hotel close to the conference venue in the West End.  My hotel was just off Oxford St. close to Marble Arch and about 20 minutes walk to the conference that was held in Piccadilly.  i chose to walk to and from the meeting every day which took me past some fantastic shops with some wonderful things on show, many on sale so i delighted in window shopping the first couple of days but, on the Wednesday, just had to buy a matching bra and pantie set that i saw in La Senza on Oxford St. They are white with pink polka dots and pink lace trim.  They are truly sissy!  On the same day, over the road, i found s hop with some wicked skirts and dresses going quite cheap and couldn’t resist a black dress with fine white polka dots, a tight fitting bodice, halter neck and a flared 50’s style skirt.  i couldn’t wait to get back to my hotel and try them on but had to go to a conference dinner and so it was after midnight before i was able to discover just how good a fit they all were.

The following morning, i had to check out of the hotel, leave my bags there while at the conference and return to collect them later on my way to the airport.  A severe weather warning was issued around lunchtime and so i left the meeting mid-afternoon so as to avoid the worst of the rush hour and impending bad weather en route to the airport.  i was lucky.  i got to the airport in good time, checked in and was in the club lounge drinking a gin and tonic when the blizzard broke.  It meant my flight was delayed by 4 hours but i got away – many didn’t.

i travelled home in the new bra and panties beneath my male outer clothes, feeling happily feminine.  Due to our late departure from Heathrow, just about everyone missed their connecting flight in Singapore, including me so i was accommodated in a lovely hotel at the airline’s expense for the night.  i was also lucky there, getting the only seat on the first available flight first thing the next morning and managed to get home late on Saturday afternoon.

The weekend was, of course, spent catching up with family and jobs around the house that had been left for my return and so no real opportunity to go online or dress properly “en femme” but gratefully all is well at home and we now start the frantic run down to Christmas at work where i need to finish 3 jobs before Wednesday night as well as do my Christmas shopping, go to Mistress Ana’s house and do the cleaning and chase up the bondage equipment and toys that Mistress Ana wishes to buy.

i did catch up with Mistress Ana today online and we chatted for a while.  i really do miss Her so much but felt really good when She complimented me on my avitar here on this blog and on Messenger.  She told me She had shown it to 2 other women at work who couldn’t believe that i was male and all complimented me on my breasts.  It really gave this gurl a boost to her self esteem!  We also chatted more about the “pussy collar” and how we are both fantasising about the device.  i imagine myself locked in place between Her thighs, kneeling on a small wheeled trolley with hands bound behind my back so that i would be taken with Her wherever She went, all covered though by Her billowing kaftan – i would be in 7th heaven and doing my lingual utmost to take Her to the same place.  We finally agreed that i would go and do Her cleaning on Wednesday so that is something to look forward to, an opportunity to serve a wonderful Mistress while enjoying myself dressed fully “en femme!”

Sadly, in all the time covered by this entry, MyVirtual Model has been offline – i miss creating my looks a lot and cannot imagine what has happened to it.

Wednesday December 9th 2009 – artistic? me? – perhaps i should go to night school?

Back to work today.  Up early, determined to get on with things as time is running out for me here in Lima.  i dressed quickly in maroon bra and panties, both satin with cute bows.  Was at my desk by 07.00am , where i slipped into maroon open toed stiletto heels, and got right down to work -  a lot of tedious legal stuff to work through!

Some nice surprises during the course of the day.  Managed to chat to Goddess Joyce online.  She is home and feeling better.  Baby Vincent is doing well, going for his first doctors check up today.  Goddess wants me to call over to see Her before i leave on Friday.  It will be Her mother’s (Senora Sylvia) birthday tea.  i will have to leave before 6.00pm to head off to the airport but i will go and say hello and deliver the silver spoon i have bought for Vincent and a silver photo frame for Senora Sylvia.

Another nice surprise was making a new friend on “My Virtual Model.” A lady who it seems has perhaps not worked out that i am a man and a sissy complimented me on one of my “looks of the day” and sent me a message saying how she liked it.  We exchanged a few messages online and became friends – i borrowed some suggestions for looks from her and will enjoy exchanging ideas on dress and fashion with her. She said she thought me to be creative, imaginative and artistic with my looks! Wow! No one has ever called me that before.

So, i was flattered and feeling more feminine than usual and the whole episode got me to thinking about what it would be like to go to “fashion school.”  There are a few of them here in Lima and i hgave to say the city has some wonderful clothing stores with individual designers.  However, i am really not artistic at all and could not draw to save my life.  But i couldn’t stop my mind wandering along this theme of perhaps being sent by Mistress to a school or night classes for example to learn things like make-up, or sewing, dressmaking or something so intrinsically female in nature that i would be the only male in a class of women.  How humiliating that would be!  i get aroused just thinking of it.  Yes, it would be more than just a little embarrassing but wouldn’t it be useful for a gurl who never had the benefit of such lessons while at school or from her mother as she grew up.

i am sure the first few lessons would be mortifying and that i would be a constant butt of jokes and ridicule but i would have to persevere if i were sent there by Mistress and not only would it make me even more humble but it would give me feminine skills that i would love to have and which would be so useful.

i sense that i could be digging a great hole for myself here for i have no doubt that this will also play on Mistress Ana’s mind until it actually happens but somehow i have a perverse desire for it to do so.  The practicalities of it may be difficult within my home city and with my work and travel commitments but…………………….one day!

Tuesday December 8th 2009 – memories of a $5 whore

A public holiday today in Peru.  Goodness knows why, it is not normally on their calender but apparently there was no military parade during their annual independence celebrations this year (July 28th) for some reason so they decided to hold it today and give everyone a holiday!  Not for me though.  i need to use every minute of my time here and although i could not meet any clients today it gave me chance to work through some data albeit in a more relaxed mode.

i slept in a bit later having stayed up later last night chatting with my business associate and flat mate on business issues.  It was almost 9.00am when i got out of bed.  i chose not to get out of my satin PJ’s straight away as all was quiet in the apartment so i began working on emails etc, while still wearing them.  In fact my associate did not stir until midday so i was able to lounge in my PJ’s until then when i slipped a T-shirt over the camisole top and a pair of shorts over the PJ shorts.  i was almost sure my flatmate would be going out and was waiting to be able to slip into full “femme” mode as soon as he left.  Alas, it was not to be!

i spent my day working on project data and dealing with emails and proposals, stopping occasionally to check if there was anyone online such as Mistress Ana, Goddess Joyce or Lady Dynah but not one of them appeared while ever i was online.  i tried calling Goddess Joyce again but still no answer so left a message.  i should go and visit Her but need details of the clinic, her room etc.  She might even be home again now for all i know.

i spent a little bit of leisure time adding to my experiences on Experience Project and made a few new friends who share similar interests and experiences.  Today, i shared my first experience dressed as a woman but serving a man.  This was some 22 years ago and it turned out to be only a one off because i got cold feet!  Not that the evening spent with him didn’t work out it was more that his longer term ideas for a relationship did not gel with mine once we chatted the following day.  As you can read below, he treated me like a prostitute which was not what i was looking for longer term.  i wanted to be treated as though i was female and to go out so dressed and socialise, go for dinner, the pictures and so on.  All he wanted was to visit me whenever he felt like, day or night for sex during which i would always be blindfolded and bound.  i think i could have coped with the sexual side of things if he had given me a little more such as having me cook for him, wash and iron his clothes or clean his apartment.  As much as i enjoyed my first experience as a whore, it was not what i wanted at the time and not what i would want now.  Thankfully, in serving Mistress Ana, i do get to do chores and run errands for Her as well as being used sexually as She may desire so i know that i am more than just a sex object.  Anyway, this first encounter of the prostitute kind went something like this…………

i entertained him at my apartment.  He had me unlock the door on receiving his phone call.  This meant he was outside.  i was then to blindfold myself and bend across the kitchen table with my hands placed behind my back.  i heard him enter the apartment and then felt his hands strongly take my wrists and cuff them together.  He then ran his hands up my nylon clad legs, over my suspenders and my panties, fondling my ass before moving up and cupping my breasts.  Oh, i cannot describe that feeling as he groped me, it was wonderful, exciting, arousing all at the same time and my cock immediately betrayed my feelings trying to break free from the black lace panties i was wearing.He had told me to dress like a slut and so i had.  In addition to black 4″ stiletto heels with an ankle strap and cute bow, i wore seamed black stockings, Victorian style corset with suspenders, black balconette bra, very short black mini skirt, flimsy see-through blouse, a long haired blond wig and heavy make up.  As i bent over the table, feeling his hands roam over my body, i began to ache not from discomfort but from a need to cum.  Just being touched by him was an amazing turn on for me.

Eventually, he stood me up and led me, still blindfold, through into my lounge where he pushed me down onto my knees.  i heard the zipper of his fly as i knelt there and i knew what was about to happen.  This would be my first time and i was prepared for it.  i wanted it. i had practiced sucking on dildos and tasted my own cum enough to have an idea of what to do and what to expect but i was not prepared for the size of his cock.  It was long alright but that was the least of my problems, it was also very thick, so thick i struggled to get it into my mouth.  i thought my jaw would dislocate, partly from the angle of my neck as i struggled to cope with his strong vertical erection from my position kneeling in front of it, trying desperately to get a little height so that i could get my mouth downwards over it.

i began licking the head of his cock and then along the shaft as i struggled for a position where i could take all of him but i need not have bothered for his hands soon locked onto either side of my head and began to manipulate me, moving my head and hence my mouth over his engorged member, working it down into my throat so that i could hardly breathe.  Gradually, i became more used to his size and to the frequency of his thrusting and my head being pushed against him so that i found a way of breathing between the thrusts which, after first becoming longer and deeper, began to increase in frequency until my whole head was forced against his abdomen, i could feel his balls against my chin and his cock so far down my throat i thought i would choke.  And he held me like that while his whole body convulsed and shook as he exploded inside my throat, pulling back a little then so that i could taste him as he shed his seed into my mouth.

Tears were running down my cheeks now, smudging my make-up.  They were tears of joy mixed with shame mixed with pain.  Joy at having been used as if i were a woman, shame at feeling like a slut and whore and pain from my aching neck and jaw as well as a sore throat.

As he subsided, he spoke gently but firmly to me, fondling me once again.  He held me to him and told me he was proud of me and how he was also going to rape my ass.  As i knelt by him in my blindfold darkness, a new fear possessed me.  His cock had seemed so big, how would my ass cope?

First though, he switched on my TV and loaded a pornographic video into the machine.  i could not see what he was watching but i could hear the unmistakable noises of sexual activity and i could feel his hand gently stroking his own member while he watched.  Not before long, he told me to get back to work on his cock and my head was guided down back over his newly erect member.  He did not manipulate my head this time but allowed me to quietly work my tongue over, around and along it, taking it fully into my mouth every so often until, after what had seemed forever, he stood up and guided me so that my face was down into the sofa.  i felt his hands pull down my panties and with his feet he pushed my knees as far apart as they would go.  Something wet then smeared first around my ass and then pushed inside by his fingers.  i think i whimpered at him then to not hurt me but i had no response from him other than gentle but firm pressure on my virgin ass as he slowly but inexorably pushed his cock inside me.  It was difficult to begin with and he retreated and added more lubricant before returning, first opening me a little more with a finger, then two and getting me more ready to accept him so that when his cock returned to my ass for the second time, i felt it make a little headway and then a stab of pain followed by a feeling of ecstasy as his cock slid deep inside me.  That stab of pain was intense and i feared he had split me but it was forgotten quickly as his cock penetrated my ass much further than any dildo i had practiced with before.  i found myself moving with him, following his rhythm, wriggling my ass trying to impale myself even further onto him.  His hands were cupping my breasts and pinching my nipples and i ached again for release but it was he who came first, his body shaking and convulsing within me.

He pulled out of me, somehow managing to leave his cum filled condom inside me.  As i knelt there i could feel his cum trickling out of it and onto my leg and then into my panties which he pulled up for me.  Then, he was back in front of me and i was tasting him again as i cleaned off his cock with my tongue.  It was becoming flaccid now and was easier for me to manage and so i soon had it cleaned to his satisfaction.

He helped me to stand and then led me back to my kitchen table where he bent me over as i had been when he arrived.  He placed a small key in my hand and told me it would release me from the cuffs once he had gone but i was not to attempt release until i heard my door close behind him.

He left me then, still dressed as a whore and now feeling like one in cum soaked panties, his jizm still seeping out of my ass.  i had not even seen his face!  i removed the cuffs and the blindfold only to find myself still in the dark.  He had switched out the lights.  When i put them back on, there on the kitchen table was a small envelope which i opened and found inside a $5 note and a message which said “Thank you slut, until next time!”  And so i was just what i felt, a $5 whore.

Monday December 7th 2009 – The Experience Project and “My Secret Life”

Back to work today.  So much to do that i did not linger in bed this morning but was up, dressed and at my desk by 7.00am.  Not before i had slipped into pink lace bra and panties though.  True, i had to wear male clothes on top but i still felt good wearing my favourite colour underneath.  The office was quiet for most of the day and i was able to wear open toed maroon, stacked stiletto heels almost all day while at my desk and at times whenever i moved around the room and from 6.00pm, i was able to slip out of the drab male garb and into a flouncy cream coloured dress with a pink and cerise coloured flower print pattern.  Much more like it and once the wig was in place, i felt quite at home.  Pity about the beard having to be grown back for i felt very much like stepping out and going round the corner to the nearest Starbucks for a coffee.  It is only about 5 blocks away and could be quite an adventure.  It is quite the place for people to hang out and who knows what might happen if ever i ventured there “en femme” – not that i have yet had either the opportunity or the nerve to go there “en femme” and alone.

So, i stayed at my desk and am happy to say managed to get the most pressing job out of the way and one or two other incidental jobs that arose during the day.  Nothing else to report though.  No sign of Mistress Ana on line and no response to phoning Goddess Joyce.  i am still feeling excruciatingly horny but gave my nipples a wide berth today, not only in deference to the wishes of Mistress Ana but also because of the growing frustration toying with them brings.  So, an element of self control is returning but for how long it will last, i can’t say.  My state of arousal and frustration is like nothing i have experienced before.

i have come across and signed on to “Experience Project” – a site where people can join and give details about their experiences across a wide range of subjects and situations without fear of exposure and so meet and get to know others who have had similar or would like to have similar experiences.  Naturally, most of my entries have been on my cross dressing and submissive experiences but i have made some new friends there and am finding that opening up about past experiences and activities is quite liberating in a way.  Not that i had any feelings of guilt that i was aware of but it seems that in sharing these experiences i am ridding myself of a burden.  Also, i find others on the project who express similar emotions and who have similar experiences in coping with their sexuality as i have and am experiencing and so by sharing these aspects of our secret lives with others it is like no longer having to hide behind a facade so at to just appease or fit into society’s norms. One of my entries has been a description of “My Secret Life” which details my being a cross dresser or sissy.  I repeat it here:-

My Secret Life

From the moment i first pulled on a skirt at the age of 10 or 11 i have known that i should have been born female.  Although this first time was at the behest of an elder female cousin with whom i was infatuated, in hindsight, it was only a matter of time before i became the cross dresser i am.  i had up until then always felt more comfortable in the company of girls without dressing as one and my infatuation with my female cousin was probably envy and a desire to be like her rather than any male-female attraction.

Since that first time, i have continued to cross-dress whenever i can.  There have been times when i have tried to give up cross dressing, due largely to society’s non acceptance of such behaviour, especially at the time i grew up in rural England.  However, inevitably i returned to cross dressing, replacing clothes i had thrown out with new ones.  But it all had to be done secretly and i found myself having to behave more macho with guys at school and college in order to better hide my secret.

There have been times when i was sure it was a sickness and i now know that it is a medical condition called Gender Dysphoria.  i thought that it was something that i would either eventually grow out of or be cured of.  i thought that when i married i would no longer need to cross dress for the sexual satisfaction that it gave me but that was when i discovered that cross dressing for me was much  more than a turn on and a prelude to masturbation, it was indeed a way of life.  Being sexually active with my wife did nothing to dampen my desire to express my femininity and become female even if only temporarily by donning women’s clothes. Though my wife discovered my secret, she refuses to have anything to do with or to encourage me in any way and has tried many times to force me to stop cross-dressing but had become resigned to the fact that this is an itch that i have to scratch and so turns a blind eye.

So, now, because i travel a lot, i am able to take female clothes with me and cross-dress and be the woman that i am inside in public.  i go out dressed “en femme” and love it.  i have a number of lady friends who know of my cross-dressing and who encourage it and take me out with them as if i were a girlfriend and we go shopping or have a manicure/pedicure together and so on.  These are times when i genuinely feel comfortable and at ease with myself.

i work hard at being as feminine as i can be by keeping my body hair to a minimum, using moisturisers and facial creams and i dress every day in bra and panties beneath my male outer clothes.  i can often get away with wearing stiletto heels while at my desk at work.  Having to remain secretive about my lifestyle is not satisfactory and i dream of being able to be my feminine self all of the time.   However, i made a choice to marry 35 years ago and i have 3 wonderful children and a grandson and in deference to their wishes, my life as a cross dresser shall remain a secret at least for the foreseeable future.

Thursday December 3rd 2009 – More about slavery

Today, i chose to wear pale blue lace panties and matching bra beneath my male outer clothes.  With a blue shirt, i was at least colour coordinated!  With a full day of meetings, i was out of the office a lot of the time and so was unable to chat with either Mistress Ana or Goddess Joyce.  So, very little to report about the day other than work related things.

So, just to add a little to yesterday’s thoughts on slavery, here is a piece that i think truly sums up slavery.  These are not my words but are quoted from slave david stein.

Slavery;

By

David Stein

slavery is not about suffering . . .
. . . slavery is about service.

slavery is not about humiliation . . .
. . . slavery is about humility.

slavery is not about pain . . .
. . . slavery is about being present.

slavery is not about being used . . .
. . . slavery is about being of use.

slavery is not about control . . .
. . . slavery is about letting go.

slavery is not about your desires . . .
. . . slavery is about giving to others.

slavery is not about abuse . . .
. . . slavery is about acceptance.

slavery is not about proving anything . . .
. . . slavery is about being real.

slavery is not about contempt . . .
. . . slavery is about respect.

slavery is not about how you look . . .
. . . slavery is about the size of your heart.

slavery is not about denying yourself . . .
. . . slavery is about being open.

slavery is not about bondage . . .
. . . slavery is about freeing your spirit.

slavery is not about punishment . . .
. . . slavery is about discipline.

slavery is not about being unable to escape . . .
. . . slavery is about being committed.

slavery is not about submission . . .
. . . slavery is about obedience.

slavery is not about fear . . .
. . . slavery is about trust.

slavery is not about sex . . .
. . . slavery is about love.

slavery is not about pleasure . . .
. . . slavery is about happiness.

slave david stein, Oct-Nov. 1998

Wednesday December 2nd 2009 – There is none so free as the slave!

i finally managed to get hold of Goddess Joyce this morning and learned that She had had a caesarian section yesterday and so Vincent had arrived and weighed in at a hearty and healthy 4.16 kilos (about 9 and a half pounds) and 52cm in length.  All went well and both mother and baby are doing fine.  i have been invited to go to the clinic and visit but will need to go and buy a small gift first.

i also had a good chat today with Mistress Ana.  Strange that we had both been thinking/fantasising about me being in service to Her 24/7.  i have to confess that were my wife to pass away before me then i would most definitely seek such a position of permanent and continual slavery and were it not for my marriage, i would be doing so right now.  Mistress was of a similar sentiment with regard to Her own marriage.

Why would anyone want to enter into permanent full time slavery? It seems a crazy notion and that the proponent would have to be insane but i can assure any reader that i am far from insane and yet crave such a status.  It is a great paradox but slavery actually brings with it an enormous freedom, a freedom from responsibility in many ways for the slave has only ever to carry out his Master’s/Mistresses wishes and is never faced with having to make decisions or be responsible for others.  Having been a business leader for most of my life and a family head also, i am used to having responsibility for others and am generally considered to be a good leader and manager but that position carries with it a burden of responsibility whereas slavery carries no burden other than the burden of service which is a giving of one’s self.  i am by nature a giving person and so for me, to give myself to someone whom i love and adore is a natural desire and hence permanent full time slavery is a natural progression.  When considering the burden of responsibility, “there is none so free as the slave nor so bound as the Master” for as much as the slave does for his owner, the owner has duty of care and is responsible for the slave.

So, thoughts of being with Mistress Ana 24/7 are constantly on my mind and are a constant source of physical and emotional arousal for me.  i dream of sleeping chained to the foot of Her bed or of having a small cell where i am kept when not in use.  i dream of being permanently “en femme” and of not only doing Mistress housework but going out and doing Her shopping, Her cooking, running errands and carrying out all manner of different tasks and duties for Her.  What would be my reward?  Certainly a regular beating whether i have done anything seriously wrong or not but a beating to confirm and reassert status, but also love and nurturing, the delight of oral service and of being held, caressed and cherished by Her, and above all, the joy and satisfaction of giving pleasure to another and of making someone else’s life better.

Finally, i chose pink today, matching lace bra and panties.  It really is my favourite colour.  Also, i noticed that “Peeptoe Shoes” are having a sale.  Oh, how i adore some of those shoes, especially these gorgeous 4″ stiletto heeled strappy red sandals and just so wish i could both afford to buy them and also that i could manage to buy them in such a way that my wife would not find out!  Talking of sales, i have joined a website called “ideeli” which is an incredible site for bargains of all kinds.  Genuine designer clothes and goods at incredible discounts but such a pity that to take advantage of the offers you have to live in the USA.  If it were a global organisation it would be fantastic.

Tuesday December 1st 2009 – feeling like my old “femme” self once again!

December already!  Can’t think where the year has gone!

The good news is that i seem to be back to my old self again.  i slept so well last night, a full 9 hours and a bit more which is rare for me, and i woke feeling good and have felt great all day.  i slipped out of my satin snake-skin patterned PJ’s and into a lilac lace bra and matching panties before pulling on a green polo shirt and a pair of khaki shorts to wear around the office all day.  i had no meetings planned for today so it was good to be able to work at my desk with the low sling back stiletto heels Mistress Ana brought me from Thailand.  i did venture out a couple of times during the day though, once to drop off a pile of very dirty field clothes at the local laundry and the other to go to the jewelers to ask them to start Mistress’ pendant.  However, i was disappointed to find that the maker is in hospital and so they cannot do it for the time being.  So, i went to another jeweler nearby and they may be able to do it but i need to go back tomorrow with the design and talk directly to the man himself.  So, we start all over from the beginning.

i managed to chat very briefly to Goddess Joyce today.  She was in the clinic about to have Vincent either induced or delivered by caesarian.  At the time of my call she was unsure what they were going to do but certain that Vincent would make an appearance sooner now than later whichever method they chose.  We spoke around midday and it is now almost 11.00pm and no news so i am hoping all is well.  i will find out tomorrow.

i tried unsuccessfully to chat with Mistress Ana this morning.  She appeared to be online but i had no response so She was probably not at Her desk.  By the time i had been to the laundry and back She was offline so i missed Her.  She will be pleased to know that i am feeling well again.  Mistress had suggested that i go out and buy myself something feminine as a treat to give my spirits a lift and although i was feeling much better today and less in need of the lift, i did buy a couple of pairs of patterned nylon leggings,one in pink and the other in grape colours.  They were on offer in a shop i passed on the way back from the laundry and i couldn’t resist.  Since early evening, once all the office staff had gone home, with my business associate also out, i have been wearing the pink ones with a short pleated brown mini-skirt and a pink polo top, wig and the pink/cerise stiletto heeled sandals i bought earlier on the trip.  Oh how good it feels to be fully “en femme” and feeling my true self once again!

i spoke to my wife on the phone first thing this morning and all is well at home with Christmas for the family all now sorted.  i am trying to get an earlier flight home.  At the moment, i don’t get home until December 22nd but finish work in the UK on December 17th and could only get wait listed flights before the 22nd.  However, there is a chance that if i pay for an upgrade, i can get the flight on the 17th and be home on the 19th which will be much better both from a Christmas preparation point of view for the family and also for cleaning Mistress Ana’s house before the festivities.

Saturday November 28th 2009 – Monday November 30th 2009 – frumpy knickers for comfort

Well, here we are on Monday as promised, the weekend over and survived.  Survived being the operative word.  At 4.00am on Saturday morning, the last thing i wanted to hear was my alarm but hear it i did and with very heavy eyelids, crawled out of bed, discarded my satin snakeskin pattern Pj’s for a basic white T-shirt bra and white cotton knickers rather than panties and then my male field clothes on top.  i had no sooner got into my field boots when the door bell rang, my taxi had arrived.  i chose the simple but decidedly unsexy white cotton knickers for comfort.  Experience previously of wearing sexy thongs or panties when out in the field and having to ride on horseback has taught me to keep to the simple and comfortable when in the field, especially with the CB-2000 in place.  The cotton knickers did have a front lace panel so it wasn’t all so mundane!

As for my health, i slept most of the 1 hour 20 minute flight and by the time i arrived at Cusco i felt almost human but still not 100%.  i was not looking forward to getting up high but had no choice in the matter.  i collected the hire vehicle and, along with my local prospecting partner, drove up from Cusco to our potential prospects where, to my discomfort found we had quite a climb to get from the road up to the mine workings we were to evaluate.  This is where i knew i would struggle.  i am not usually bad at altitude, a little slower than those who live there but i do not normally suffer headaches, nausea or fainting and dizziness.  Having been suffering from nausea for a couple of days, i was apprehensive about heading up the side of a mountain at over 4,000m altitude but nevertheless, i set off.  i was slower than usual but not too slow.  It began to rain heavily before we reached the mine workings where we sheltered for a while until the rain eased and finally stopped.  i was glad of the shelter and time to sit awhile and catch my breath.  At times on the way up, i had had to stop and let my head clear for i did go dizzy now and then.  No headache though, i am glad to say and, after checking over the workings and finding lots of coarse grained gold in the rock, i felt much happier on the way down.  The rain had stopped, the sun shone and going down was just so much less effort!

Once back at the car, we began the drive back to Paucartambo only to have the vehicle break down on the way.  We managed to crawl into a small village where we left the 4WD hire car and took a bus into Paucartambo, where we sent the night.  A small regional centre, Paucartambo has no real hotels just guest houses or hostals, none of which are particularly attractive and in the end, we had little choice, only one was prepared to offer us a room.  There was no water so a shower was out of the question (it would have been cold even had there been water!). We were able though to phone the car hire company in Cusco who were superb and sent a replacement vehicle out to us straight away.  Mind you, it was after midnight by the time they had driven the 3 hours from Cusco by which time i was exhausted and sound asleep.  Fortunately, i was able to delegate responsibility for dealing with the car hire people to my prospector associate.

It rained very heavily overnight and the following morning, as we drove out to our second set of workings to visit, the roads were treacherous.  Imagine driving narrow dirt mountain roads with drops of several hundreds of metres down to ravines when the weather is good and the roads dry.  It can be scary enough, especially when meeting a large truck coming in the other direction with no passing places!  Now think of it when the roads are just wet mud and the slightest touch on the brakes sends you into an uncontrollable skid.  Add to that, a driver locked into a chastity device that has got his scrotum pinched in a couple of places and he is unable to do anything about it as he drives along and you have a reasonable picture of Your’s truly behind the wheel.

Once again, we had a lengthy walk and climb to get to the workings and true to form, it was raining quite steadily as i stopped the car.  But on this occasion, by dint of a painfully pinched scrotum, i was quickly out of the car and walking off up the mountainside if only to try and get to a position where i could get my hand inside my knickers, the same ones as i had worn yesterday, and discretely adjust the CB-2000’s position.  i am happy to say that i managed to do just that and, as with the day before, i struggled up the mountainside to the workings where once again, we found significant coarse grained gold and were able to hold an impromptu meeting with the claim owners and negotiate a good deal for all.  So, once again, our descent was a happy one.

Our journey back to Cusco was difficult and in continuing rain and treacherous road conditions.  Several stretches of mud made driving the mountain roads very dangerous.  At one point, on a series of bends on the side of a mountain, i braked well in advance of the next bend only to feel the car sliding inexorably on towards the bend with no traction or sign of turning the corner.  My associate woke from dozing and was convinced we were going over the edge.  He thought i was crazy when i took my foot off the brake and let the engine try to slow us but it was the only way, the wheels had to find traction or we were finished and when they found traction they had to pull us round the bend.  i could see a low grassy bank at the edge of the drop and was gambling on the wheels finding some grip there and so they did.  As soon as the front wheels found the slightly firmer ground, the bit and the rear of the car swung quickly around and we were suddenly parallel to the drop and pulling away around the bend.  i still can’t believe how calm i was through the whole episode.  i did not panic but just followed instinct in trying to get the car around the bend.  We came very close to disaster but yet i never felt scared and remained calm, something which impressed my prospector partner.  Having said that, there must have been a lot of luck involved too – i might have used up another of my lives!

Overnight in my usual hotel in Cusco was luxury.  So nice to be able to soak in a hot bath and then rinse off in a stinging hot shower.  After that, my appetite, which had deserted me these last few days, returned with a vengeance.  So, in clean fresh but still white cotton knickers and a clean white lace bra, i went to my favourite little trattoria and tucked into a medium sized Calzone of the house, washed down with a Chilean red wine.  After struggling through the weekend, i was beginning to feel more like my old self.

i chatted at length with the lady who owns and manages the trattoria.  Over the last couple of years we have got to know each other quite well. i was astounded though when Her 3 daughters appeared after having been dining in another room with father.  It had been the youngest’s first Holy Communion earlier in the evening so they had been celebrating.  All 3 girls were attractive looking girls in their own right but my astonishment was at how mature and stunningly sexy the eldest daughter appeared.  Very much like her mother in looks but did she ever carry herself well.  She not only looked stunning but she moved in such a way as to be enticingly seductive and, i am sure that she was well aware of the effect she had on male onlookers.

Today, Monday, was another early start for an early morning flight and after thinking last night that i was well over whatever bug had ailed me, i was not so sure at 5.00am this morning.  However, it was most probably just the early rising and relative lack of sleep for having slept again on the plane, by the time i reached Lima i felt Ok.  Back in the office though, there was a mountain of email’s to work through as well as accounts to be brought up to date and so little time for chatting online.  i tried to catch up with Goddess Joyce on the phone but to no avail so i have no idea whether or not little Vincent has made his appearance.  i did get to chat with Mistress Ana, albeit briefly, but it was good to be back in touch with Her again and to make plans as to how i can get to Thailand either with or without my wife and how we might manage to have me serve Her while my wife was distracted on other things that Mistress had planned.  All food for thought and something for me to work towards for next September/October.

Thursday November 26th 2009 – Thanksgiving!

Though it might have been a holiday for some, not for me so it was up as usual and off to work but not before i had put on the same pink lace and mesh bra as yesterday and with a pair of panties to match.  Both under my male clothes of course.  Mind you, i was looking forward to the evening.  Having been invited for Thanksgiving dinner by Goddess Joyce, i had half an inkling that i might be able to change “en femme” once there.  i had no idea who else might be there other than Her mother and husband but it hasn’t mattered much in the past for i have been present as roxie in front of friends and family on a number of occasions.  It just seems to depend on which family members are present.

In any event, it was work before pleasure and i had quite a full day working on attracting finance for our exploration ventures as well as trying to turn out products for a client to bring in some funds that will pay the bills.  As the day wore on i began to feel unwell.  By lunchtime i had a headache and felt nauseous rather than hungry.  i tried eating something and then regretted it for it just made me feel worse.  i was thinking of calling Goddess Joyce and making my excuses but see all too little of Her as it is so held off until i felt really unwell.  As it turned out, not unexpectedly, Goddess Joyce interrupted my day at about 3.00pm, with some requests for me to pick some things for Her to bring along in the evening.  This is par for the course.  She likes to give me challenges and make me run around town for Her.  She wanted 3 music CDs that She apparently has been unable to find.

i had planned to visit a jeweler on my way to Goddess’ apartment to see about getting a pendant made for Mistress Ana so taking in a couple of music stores that i knew that were nearby would not be a problem, i just hoped that they would have the CDs.  As it turned out, the first store i entered had all three and i didn’t even have to search for them.  The assistant was just great!  At the jewelers, no problem in making the pendant for about $200 in solid gold.  Now i just need to know if that will be OK for Mistress Ana.  So, instead of the hour and a half i had allowed myself, i was finished in half an hour so had the best part of an hour to kill before continuing on to Goddess’s apartment.

i had already decided not to take any “femme” clothing because i really did not feel 100%.  My headache had eased but my muscles still ached.  i felt like i was coming down with the flu and even though it was quite warm, i would shiver at times and feel hot at others.  i considered canceling again but in the end i turned up, still a little early but was made very welcome.  Senora Sylvia, Goddess’ mother was there, busy in the kitchen.  i offered to help but was quickly told to open the wine i had brought, pour some for everyone and relax. In addition to Senora Sylvia and Goddess’ sub-husband, Goddess’ aunt, uncle and cousin also arrived.  We enjoyed an excellent meal with good conversation although i confess that at times the speed of the spanish left me behind.  However, i chatted a lot with Goddess’ uncle, a macho CID policeman.  i couldn’t help wondering what he would have thought or said had he knew about my D/s relationship with Joyce and that under my male clothes i was wearing feminine underwear.  i wondered too if he could smell my female deodorant?  Whatever, he was kind enough to give me a lift home afterward.

Goddess’ aunt is a stunning looking lady although only short.  She has the most beautiful eyes and an enormous bust line for someone so short and with such a slender waist.  But it is Her eyes that catch attention even though She wore a beautiful low cut green patterned top with sequins that made no attempt to hide Her magnificent breasts.  Also, for someone so small, She has a commanding presence in a room.  i remembered meeting Her previously at Goddess’ wedding and thinking then how well She made Her presence felt without going over the top.

As the evening went on though, i began to feel more an more jaded and was getting to be eager to leave.  i noticed Goddess, now exactly 40 weeks pregnant and looking every day of it, closing Her eyes for a moment in a lull in the conversation.  When She opened them again i caught Her eye and mentioned that She must be tired and too my, and i think also Her, relief, everyone agreed that it was time to head home. It was gone 11.00pm and by the time i fell into bed close to midnight, i couldn’t get into bed fast enough.  By now, i was quite feverish and lay in bed shivering one minute and sweating the next.  i had made myself a hot toddy of lemon juice, whisky and honey and taken a couple of panadol in the hope of warding off whatever it was that was about to bug me and soon drifted off to sleep.

Tuesday November 24th 2009 – oh to be chained to a desk!

A busy day today with a number of meetings.  i chose the same olive-grey lace bra to wear today as i wore yesterday but today chose a lilac coloured thong.  Not exactly colour coordinated but then a gurl can’t have everything, especially with a limited wardrobe which, when travelling is even more restricted.

Chatted briefly online with Mistress Ana today.  she is preparing for another trip to Thailand and once again has a luggage allowance problem.  With taking so much equipment over to their clinic/resort there, each time She goes She is pushing the bounds of what airlines will allow.

No contact with Goddess Joyce today so am wondering about whether baby Vincent has decided to get his act together?  i will find out tomorrow no doubt.

One of my meetings today was with a corporate lawyer in his company’s offices.  i was met by a very attractive receptionist who bade me sit down and wait for the lawyer i was meeting to come through.  As i waited, female lawyers, legal secretaries and other female staff were busying around and all were stunningly attractive.  This is not unusual here in Peru where women always make the best of themselves and manage to look good at all times but it is also something i notice about the offices of all the lawyers i have met here.  All of their women are beautiful with stunning figures and are expensively and elegantly dressed.  i was sat musing over whether this was because of a recruitment policy or because the charges lawyers are renowned for making pays for the clothing and probably a significant amount of cosmetic surgery besides when i was ushered through to a meeting room by a guy dressed like a waiter who offered to make me tea or coffee.  It broke my reverie for a moment but then, as he went off to make my tea, had me thinking what it must be like to be at the lowest end of the food chain in such an office full of gorgeous women and being their errand boy, placing myself in such a position and then moving on to fantasise about Mistress Ana’s desire to have me fixed permanently beneath Her office desk in Thailand where i would be available to serve her orally whilever She was at Her desk, irrespective of whoever else might enter the room.  By the time my lawyer arrived for the meeting, i was really quite lost in my fantasy!  Oh to be chained to a desk, Mistress Ana’s desk! One day, Mistress Ana, one day……………